Setting The Table and Getting the Party Started with Gwyneth Paltrow

Gwyneth Paltrow in conversation with Martina Mondadori about the crucial elements of entertaining.

What are your ingredients for a perfect party at home, and how do you keep a party going?

I like the atmosphere to feel warm and friendly when people arrive. I usually set out platters of different cheeses and hors d'oeuvres so that it's relaxed at the start. Then, of course, I like to set a beautiful table; that's the more formal part of the evening. The way I keep a party going now is definitely different than how I did 30 years ago. I think meaningful dinner conversation is what makes a party feel like it was valuable and time well spent. Sometimes, I like to produce interesting questions and lead a single-thread conversation at the table.

When it comes to throwing a dinner party, do you lean more towards etiquette or creativity?

I think I'm more on the etiquette side, and my husband would definitely agree. I think I fall under "modern" etiquette. Some level of creativity is really lovely, but I do love the tradition and structure of old-world etiquette.

We know the kitchen is such an essential part of everyone's home. What role does a kitchen play in your home, and do you keep it open for guests when you entertain? Is it part of the flow?

Well, you're right that the kitchen is a very important part of my home. The flow of my houses are intentionally designed with the kitchen as the heart of the home. I always keep it open for guests when I entertain, and I love having more informal dinners with friends standing around the kitchen. While I make drinks or cook, I often have friends and family gathered in there, just hanging out.

Do you like to mix generations when entertaining at home?

I love mixing generations. I remember once, one of my best friends from high school, Hillary, who lives in Sun Valley, came to a birthday party I was hosting in Los Angeles. She lives up in the mountains in Idaho, which isn't exactly the most diverse place. Afterwards, she said, "That was amazing!" because, at the party, I had my dad's best friend and his wife, people from my parents' generation, friends younger than me, and people of all races and sexual orientations. I really believe that makes for such an interesting night. And I especially love my older friends, some in their 80s, for their wisdom and insight.

Describe your table setting at home in California and in Italy.

I'm getting very, almost worryingly, into table settings as I get older. It's crazy because you could really remortgage your house in order to buy beautiful plates, glassware, and silver. I find myself especially drawn to beautiful china pieces. In Italy, because we're so deeply in the country, my table settings are more casual and relaxed, but we still like to collect beautiful pieces.

Why do you believe the art of table setting is experiencing such a revival in contemporary culture? 

To me, the table setting is an old-fashioned relic in the most beautiful way. I think there's a longing for a simpler time. It seems we have this nostalgia for a pre-social media time, for the elegance of our parents and grandparents and the traditions that were set forth in those generations. A thoughtfully set table makes people feel honored, as guests, to come and sit down at a beautiful table with a lot of thought put into it. It also sets the tone and creates an inviting atmosphere at a party.

How do you approach flowers for an event or specifically for a table? 

Around my home, I like them very simple and beautiful, as if you went into the garden and picked them yourself, never too studied or overdone. I think a table can look a bit tacky when the flowers are perfectly arranged; it makes people feel stiff.

Do you like being a house guest or having guests stay with you? Or better just for a meal and then everyone back to their own homes?

I love having guests stay with me. I find those unexpected moments, like bumping into each other in the hallway on the way to bed, to be so fun. I love being in pajamas in the morning with a cup of coffee. It's such a different kind of conversation than you have at a dinner party; the tenor is much more relaxed and unguarded.

What is the best hostess gift you have ever been given?

I love it when people bring things from their garden. Often, on Long Island, in the summer, people will come over with big, beautiful vegetables or flowers from their gardens or eggs from their chickens. I always love that.

Best dinner party you ever attended?

Wow, that's a really tough question. I've had so many incredible dinners in my life! I can remember one in the not-too-distant past where it was just such a fantastic collection of people. We all laughed so hard we thought we would just burst. That was probably my favorite one that I've had recently.

Last but not least, describe Cabana in three words.

Tastemaker, old-world, elegant

Go-to dinner party recipe

I like to roast salmon at 350 degrees and pair it with a seasonal, flavorful sauce. Right now, it’s a summery salsa verde made with basil, cilantro, parsley, mashed anchovies, a splash of acid, and good olive oil. I’ll usually serve it with a tomato, peach, and burrata salad and a pan-roasted vegetable on the side. It’s not too much work and comes together quickly.

Go-to dinner party playlist

https://music.apple.com/us/playlist/a-wine-and-cheese-gathering/pl.b7857d404ec84c60aef2d93c8efaeeb4